who do you see


Do you ever look into the mirror or a photo of you and wonder what impression you make on people? Who do you see? Who do you think they see? Do you make people feel warm and fuzzy or do they avoid you? Do you feel you are judged? Do you judge others before they have a chance to open their mouth?

I was struck by these questions by a recent event that most of us would probably quickly slide over. I was complementing a woman’s hairdo who I’ve known for a short period of time. The response I got was a “That’s pretty much the only thing I like about myself“. I wondered. This is a beautiful, confident and intelligent woman. Truly.

What makes a 30+, 40+ or even a 50+ year old woman not embrace her body and flush those insecurities down the toilet once and for all? Why wouldn’t that woman dress her curves rather than hiding them and love herself? Especially in a day and age when curves are being celebrated again! …when you re-discover those long forgotten Marilyn Monroe photos when she was a size 10!

The thing about body image is this. If you want to look lean, you have to work for it. …hard. If you really think that women in their thirties and forties look lean because they have great genes or they are just lucky, you’re naive. By the time you step into your thirties, you better take advantage of your gym membership! Now, top this off with a condition that causes you not being able to go for a week to do your business. I have to work out vigorously 4 times a week just to maintain my metabolism. Sometimes I think I could go without eating for two days and I’d still be putting on weight if I didn’t worked out. So, I kind of have an idea how much willpower and dedication it takes.

But here’s the bottom line: If you want to look like that skinny b..h next door, get up and work for it! Otherwise embrace and love yourself and dress those curves! I used to be 2-3 times my current size and I was the same fashion lover with a closet that’s too small as I am today. Oh! Since fast fashion brings us the most affordable clothing in a huge a variety, the “I can’t afford to look stylish” phrase doesn’t fly anymore either.

With this story, I only want to encourage you to be who you are! Never quit looking your best, but also don’t kill yourself. Embrace and dress those curves! As I refuse taking medication or being in constant pain, a diet rich in fiber and working out has become part of my lifestyle. I haven’t stood on a scale or counted calories in years. The way my clothes fit speaks to me loud enough.

Who do you see when you look into the mirror?

Photo by Rick Robillard

  • http://www.willfullyelegant.com/ WE

    Oh Bogi, you touched such an important topic!! I felt very insecure and still do some days with my changing body after becoming a Mom, but I am embracing this change and I know I will have to work to get back to where I was, its not going to be easy, it hasnt been really.Some days are better than others. I procrastinate and make excuses, but other days I push harder to do better. I know blogging is a huge motivation for me to look the part and keep working out.

  • Whitney

    Thank you! I needed that today.


    Whitney & Blaire

    Peaches In A Pod

  • merel

    Wow! Great post. So inspired!

    X Merel

  • http://www.straightastyleblog.com/ Amy Ann Arnold

    Great inspiration! You definitely have to work at being stylish and fit. I wish it came easier!

    Amy Ann
    Straight A Style

  • http://dailystylefinds.com/ Lisa @ Daily Style Finds

    Great post, Bogi. I think it is so difficult today to not judge ourselves with all the social media that makes people look “perfect”. We need to embrace (and be happy) with who we are – because we are all unique and special in our own way!

    Daily Style Finds

  • Happinessatmidlife

    Congrats on losing the weight and being able to maintain it. I am really struggling with my weight right now and working on changing my eating habits. It is all about balance. Great post!

    Thank you for being a part of TBT Fashion link up and hope to see you soon!



  • Saliza Mohd Nazri

    True. We need to work hard for what we want. After gaining 16 kg due to my pregnancy, i was afraid i could not get back my pre-baby weight. But luckily after 8 months, i lost all the extra kilograms. Phew. they key to that was mainly clean eating and taking care of a baby boy which is rather a calorie-burning daily activity.
    I love all your posts! and i love the chicwish skirts you’ve been flaunting. due to your post, i have successfully bought a midi skirt from chicwish and now im eagerly waiting for my parcel :)